Nobody is getting screwed. I've been the person making the gap many many times. You just ignore them, it isn't hard - they are way up there and I'm way back here, plenty of space. I just keep on with my business of safely driving. Sure I often wish I could go the speed limit - but in reality I'm going almost as fast as they are so it isn't like a few feet lost costs me anything. Odds are I'll be stopped at a red light and lose a lot more time once I get off the highway.

Besides, there are only a few people who ever merge in front of me (and then those who don't merge block their lane so nobody else can get in).

In high traffic you’re definitely being screwed - both by the continuing lack of a proper safety gap, and by not being able to go a normal speed. Which does add up in many of these situations.

But I guess we should just all self gaslight to feel better about it?

In heavy traffic nobody is going "normal speed". I'm not going significantly slower than anyone else.

In Bay Area traffic I’d literally be not moving at all for most of the time if I followed you advice, in heavy traffic. That’s the exact situation I’m talking about.